The comment box on Friday's birthday wish list post pointed out a possible lack of tact and manners on my part.
For the record, the list was published in the hopes it would be helpful for the family and friends who had asked about what to get Bennet for his birthday. I knew I was running a risk of casting a bad light on myself, but for the sake of said loved ones I took a chance. (I thought it was a small risk - I guess I was wrong.)
I apologize for misrepresenting my family and my intentions.
Also, I appreciate the challenge to be more grateful and appreciative for the many gifts we've been given through the time, talent and treasure of people who love us.
This incident further affirms my belief that the people who love me know I'm a bit of an ass, but are generous enough to love me anyways.
Updated: Thank you to the friends who have assured me that they were not insulted by the wish list, or thought it to be in bad taste. Thank you also to those who pointed out that how people view such lists greatly depends on how one was raised. When I read the comment I wasn't sure if it was an opportunity to personally attack me or if it was an impression that most of my friends and readers would share. Whatever the case, I appreciate the opportunity to clarify why I did what I did and to make sure no one was insulted by it.
7 comments:
Actually, Bonnie, you are very appreciative, humble, and in no way a needy spoiled brat. : ) I don't think being grateful for any gift received and suggesting types of gifts that would be most useful are mutually exclusive. You actually gave me two great ideas for Lucas's Christmas list - the drums and the puzzle rack. I thought it was a great 7 Quick Takes post! Hope your week of birthday prep goes well.
Bonnie, you are NOT an ass!!! That word and "Bonnie" just don't belong in the same sentence, ever. In all the time I've known you, I've wished I could follow your example more, in terms of faith and caring toward others. I have to believe that 99.9% of the people who read that last blog knew exactly what you meant and understood that you were not being ungrateful in ANY way. That didn't cross my mind once. I feel bad for the people who don't know you personally and realize how awesome you are :)
Since I've been following your blog for a few years, I know that you've done this for Lydia, and in no way is your suggestion list wrong. In fact, I think your family and friends would appreciate it for budgeting purposes. Toys are expensive these days, and I know personally I like to know what I'm going to buy so I can put that price in my weekly budget. I can see where another might think it's greedy and selfish, but if they knew you and your family they would quickly change their mind. :)
We make our wishlists on Amazon.com and it's great because it has a favorite button that can add items from other stores' websites to your amazon wishlist. Then we can share the link to our wishlist with our family; but actually we don't have to share the link because everyone in the family does this and knows where to find each other's wishlists. It makes Christmas and Birthdays a pleasure to shop for because you know you're getting people what they want and you can expect to get some things you're wanting as well!
I think it was the way that you made the list. To say that you want those things for Bennett is fine. To give suggestions for people that ask what you would like for him to get as a gift is fine. But when you just post a list like that, it looks bad. Also, you could end up getting 20 drums whereas if your mom asked and you said drum, and travis's mom asked and you mentioned another item, then you wouldn't get duplicates. There isn't anything wrong in giving suggestions as long as you do it with tact.
Bonnie -
Knowing you personally and reading your blog for awhile, I don't think that it was in any way selfish to post a list. Trying to buy gifts for kids' birthdays is really hard! My sis-in-law sent out a note with my nephew's birthay party invitations detailing what he's interested in and what sizes of clothes he wears. No different in my book! It allows the gift giver to get an appropriate gift that will be loved by the child and the parent.
So don't let one sour person who probably has no idea who you are ruin your day. I hope Bennet (with one T) :) has a great birthday!
Jen
We also make a birthday list for the kids. It helps the family know what the kids are interested in and what we may need.
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